16 Kinds of People You Should Never Tell Your Secrets

“I wanted to let the world know that no one had a perfect life, that even the people who seemed to have it all had their secrets.”

Jeannette Walls

Are there people you should never tell your secrets to? Really?

Are there secrets you should never reveal about yourself?

You may be thinking, “Why reveal my secret to someone when I can keep it to myself without telling anyone?”

Right! Very beautifully put. We don’t always wish to reveal our secrets. However, there are times when our need for a shoulder to cry on leads us to expose some of our secrets to others.

Whatever motivates you to reveal your secrets, you must be extremely cautious about whom you tell it to. 

You don’t want to fall victim to backstabbers who will either use your secrets against you or reveal it to the wrong people at any given time.

If you value self-happiness, you must be cautious about the people you allow in on elements of your life that few people are aware of.

If you are the type of person who keeps other people’s secrets secure, don’t make the mistake of assuming that everyone is like you.

We’ll look at many types of persons you should never reveal your secrets to. 

People you will most likely not want to tell your secrets include:

1. Supposed friends who become strangers when enraged.

It is believed that the genuine measure of loyalty and love is how others treat you even when they are angry. If we want to talk about people we shouldn’t tell our secrets, then these set of persons will be on the radar.

There should always be a clear distinction between rage and actions or words spoken in anger.

Imagine being so close to someone, yet when they become angry, they disclose everything whispered in private to anybody who cares to listen, all in the name of rage.

This is a red flag because it’s an indication that they do not truly value your relationship with them. Why would anyone want to share their secrets with such individuals? I honestly do not know.

2. People who overreact when they are ecstatic

Again, there is this other type of people you should never tell your secrets.

They are the persons who becomes ecstatic when they are excited. What usually happens is that they begin to spill information you told them in confidence out of excitement.

You should be wary of such a particular type of individual because they are untrustworthy and cannot control their tongues at the time. You are correct; be cautious of what you tell them because it may become public in the midst of their excitement.

3. Individuals who feel compelled to speak simply to contribute to conversations

Have you ever had a close pal or acquaintance who always wants to be a part of every conversion going on around them?

They always want to have a contribution during an ongoing discussion. They know that they have nothing meaningful to say, yet they want to be heard.

What happens most times is that they just speak to be accepted or be seen as one who belongs.

However, the disadvantage is that your secrets may be their juicy contribution in such situations. They may use your secret as conversation starters in order to feel seen and heard in a group setting. All you have to do is observe how they behave in small groups and their conversations in such settings.

4. People who exaggerate and blow up minor issues.

Have you ever met someone who likes to blow things up? You should be cautious about what they know. This group of people can add and sugarcoat words to make them sound bad to the listening party.

Such people astound you with their versions of events, especially if you witnessed them as well.

You might start to wonder if you were really there in the first place, or if this same person is telling you something else. Of course, you were present; this is who they are. They say it the way they believe it should be said in order to feel better about themselves.

5. People you don’t trust

This is an easy one to grasp. We all have instincts that serve as guides for how we navigate through life.

The moment we feel something is off about someone, then such person shouldn’t know any secret or private detail about us, until we believe we have a better understanding of the person.

Until that happens, we should never tell such a person anything we want to keep private, no matter how much we laugh with them or spend time with them.

Our gut instinct about the person may be correct, and we should trust it until we notice a change in vibe.

6. People who struggle to grasp the fundamental concepts of life

Depending on your perspective and philosophy on life, life can be both complex and simple. This is what is obtainable in real life. However, the reality is that life is somewhat simple and complex, which not everyone fully comprehends.

Some people are unaware that nothing is one-dimensional. If you have people in your life who find it difficult to understand some basic unwritten rules of life, you should try not to reveal your secrets to them.

Such people may never comprehend context, the points you are attempting to make, or the confidentiality of what you are sharing with them. As a result, it’s best to avoid experimenting with this group of people.

7. People who always do things for others solely to get something in return

It is said that nothing compares to 100% altruism, that is, nothing goes for nothing. While this statement appears to be false on the surface, upon closer examination, it is found to be correct. We never do things completely without a vested interest in the outcome.

The return could occur in a variety of ways, including physically, emotionally, spiritually, and so on. However, you should be wary of people who come to your aid solely to get something in return, or vice versa.

This simply means that if you help someone and then stop helping them for whatever reason, the likelihood of their loyalty diminishing from 100 to 0 is very high.

These people are easily persuaded to reveal information about you that you must have told them in confidence. They believe you owe them nothing and have nothing else to offer them. They are easily purchased.

It’s different when you have people who do things for you most of the time because they’re naturally built that way.

To them, no matter what happens, they will always have your back because they are on your side regardless, not because they are keeping your secret for you in exchange.

8. People who are directly competing with you whether at work or in a social gathering

I believe this comes across clearly. Why should you reveal your secrets to a direct competitor in the name of being close and friendly with them should be the question.

Did you forget about the other side of the coin, the ‘tail,’ which is the polar opposite of the ‘head’? What happens if the coin flips? How would you react?

You may be good friends with that person today and enemies tomorrow for whatever reason. Are you certain that the person will not leverage on what you must have told them in private against you if such an event occurs?

You don’t want to gamble with your life. No, I don’t believe so.

That simply means that no matter how close you get to your direct competitor, you should never reveal information that you want to keep private from them.

Because they have that weapon, and may be forced to use it against you someday if the opportunity presents itself.

9. People who have low self-esteem and do not sufficiently love themselves

It would be a bad idea, in my opinion, to reveal a secret to someone you know has low self-esteem. Everyone experiences low self-esteem from different viewpoints.

I’d like to concentrate on the aspect where this particular person does not truly love themselves.

Someone who always feels unheard and as if the world is against them and that they are not good enough to mingle with you or have critical conversations with you.

The bottom line is that if someone does not truly love themselves for who they are, how can they love you enough to keep your secret?

Imagine if they get out of control and start thinking they’re not good enough in comparison to you

There’s a chance they’ll use what you told them in confidence as an ego boost to show off to others in their own warped way that you’re not as good as they think you are.

That low self-esteem mentality continues to cloud their minds, preventing them from seeing beyond what is truly unimportant in life.

You should try to keep some important things away from them until they learn to understand and love themselves.

10. People who are envious of your success

Some people will undoubtedly be envious of your position in life and how far you have progressed.

It goes without saying that revealing a secret with anyone in this category is strictly prohibited.

When you notice that someone close to you is envious of the success of others for no apparent reason, that’s your cue to never tell your secrets if you wish to keep a secret.

You do not want anyone to reveal your secrets to an enemy who is looking for ways to bring you down.

If someone is envious about your success, then they may someday want to use the secrets you revealed to them as a weapon against you, just to bring you down.

In order to avoid being in such complicated situations, never tell your secrets, private stories and issues to such people under any circumstances.

They will likely use the secrets you revealed to them against you in secret.

11. Individuals who do not think for themselves

People who have difficulty forming their own original opinions and are easily swayed into believing in something you might call myopic.

Imagine telling your friend who literally ask five different people what they think they should do even in simple things like if they should join a particular team they have come to love or not.

You may not see that as anything, but if they do it almost in everything they do, then you should know that it’s an outright red flag.

You should never reveal your secrets to them in any way. Telling them your secrets will be like handing a child a knife to hold. It is a risky move to take.

One of the reasons why you should never tell your secrets to such people is because they will always want to involve a third party whenever they disagree with you.

But why wouldn’t they want to involve a third party when they are incapable of making the simplest of decisions on their own.

That said, you definitely don’t want to irritate them because you might end up irritating your secrets.

12. Persons who do not like to mind their own business

Try never to tell your secrets to people who do not like to mind their business.

There are those who always want to know everything that is going on, whether it is related to them or not.

They are always curious and will go to great lengths to find out what happened so that they can talk about it with someone else.

They are an instant red flag to never tell a secret because they are the first point of target when anyone else wants to learn something about you.

The likeliness that they wouldn’t tell your secrets is slim? So why reveal your secrets to these people? It will mean that you are experimenting.

13. Persons whom you perceive have a shallow mindset

These are the people who find it difficult to understand why you did what you did or why you said what you said, even when you explain it to them from your perspective.

They tend not to comprehend a certain aspect of life because such reasoning appears alien to them, and they have no idea that life can be played in a variety of ways.

Try not to reveal your secrets to such individuals. They may appear to grasp your views at first, but when issues emerge later in the future, their tongues are likely to wag, and they might utter some of the same words you clarified to them.

At this point, you’ll realize that the reason they delayed questioning you earlier was because they didn’t want to offend you at the time.

This is the more reason why you should never tell your secrets to such persons, as they will always interpret life from a limited perspective.

They are unable to see the situation’s entire context, especially if it does not currently satisfy their desires.

14. People who perceive you to be a perfect person

If someone close to you believes you are a perfect person just because you have a high level of emotional intelligence that they have failed to recognize you have built and worked on over time, you should be very cautious about the secrets you reveal to them.

If they can’t see your flaws even when you tell them to their face that you have flaws and make mistakes that they see but choose to ignore for whatever reason, then you should be cautious to never tell your secrets to them.

The reason for this is that no matter how many times you tell them that you are far from perfect, all they will ever believe is what their mind has decided.

If you ever disagree with them for whatever reason, they may use everything they believe they know about you to prove to the world that you are not such a perfect person.

Remember that this “perfect person persona” they created for you is in their head, not because you told them you are perfect.

You can try to change their perception about you all you want, but try never to tell your secrets to them, even when you feel they have changed.

Bear in mind that you are the one trying to help them understand you, they are not the ones making the efforts to understand you.

In the end, they will be back to where they started off from. The point is to never reveal your secrets to them regardless of what ever change your feelings may be making you believe about them.

15. People who go around desperately searching for someone to call a friend

Never reveal your secrets to anyone you suspect is desperately searching for someone to call a friend or someone who will be loyal to them.

During their quest, they may tend to tell the other person a lot of things in order to persuade them that they are a special friend they should have.

The point is that you should never tell your secrets to a person who is desperate to find people to call their friend.

If you never reveal your secrets to such people, then you will likely not be used as a pawn during conversations.

16. People who insult others over trivial matters

It goes without saying that you should never reveal your secrets to people who take pleasure in insulting and disrespecting others at will.

While they may respect you now because they have no problems with you, they may fight you dirty in the future, using your secrets as a weapon.

Tell them your secrets at your peril. One day, you’ll look back and wish you hadn’t.

Look around, you may have someone like this you call a friend, and you know that this is who they are. Never tell your secrets any more than you have already.

If they can insult others over issues that are unimportant, then they may reveal your secrets someday if you happen to fallout with them.

One of the reasons why you should never tell your secrets to these set of persons is because you do not want to have regrets which can bring you down emotionally.

In Conclusion

The simplest way to ensure that your secrets are kept by those you believe are capable of keeping secrets is to tell them directly to never reveal your secrets to anyone.

The reason for this is that what you may consider a secret may be nothing to another person.

To ensure it remains a secret, try to be clear and direct in your statements when telling someone.

For a moment, if you sense that a person who you are getting close to exhibits any of the aforementioned tendencies or similar, refrain from revealing your secrets to them.

But bear in mind that regardless of what happens, humans will be humans.

The question is what to do when everyone knows your secret? What you have to do is both simple and complex. It all depends on how you wish to handle it.

The simple part is that you’ll have to come to terms with your reality, and accept the betrayal of trust, and then find ways to move on. You should never consider harming yourself in any way.

Try to live a good life to the best of your ability. Avoid having secrets that may force you to want to take your own life if they come to light.

Always keep it in mind that there are people you should never tell your secrets, no matter what.

Never tell your secrets to anyone whom you do not trust can control their emotions when the going gets rough. You will be saving yourself emotional stress and trauma.

The red flag is almost always there. Do not let emotions and excitements take charge of your rational mind.

Try to stay happy and try your best to stay strong even if your little secrets ever come to light.